Monday, May 30, 2011

The Children - Babies Caught In Between

"The baby's coming next week." My Son reminded Me few days ago.

"Temporary only." I counter-reminding him as per our agreement.

The baby is being looked after by her grandmother.
But since her grandfather is sick and now, bedridden, the elderly woman's hands are full.
I agree for the baby to be temporarily placed here while the mother is at work - before a permanent baby-sitter is found. 

"No, the grandmother now has to work already. They have no money for medication."

"But You already know I'm going KL Friday." I reminded Him.

"Bring baby along." My Son insisted.

"Many weddings in Singapore this June holiday." A good excuse I supposed.

"Make passport for her then."  

"Where's the father?"

"Run away." 
 I stopped there and then, thinking of the young mother, now single-handedly, has to juggle her role as a mother and a bread-winner.

Out of desperation, she contacted My Son months ago, who was her ex-colleague.
We stay not too faraway from her mother.
He, in turn, asked My help.

Honestly, I had forgotten how to look after small babies.
She will be one-year old next month.
I called around, looking for someone who can baby-sit, but found none.

Yesterday, I looked for a baby-sitter again.
But instead, this lady pleaded Me to help looking after the infant Myself.
She had seen too many cases of neglect and non-appropriate words usage, used by baby-sitters and their families to infants who are learning to communicate.

Her granddaughter was abused, by non other than a registered nursery in PJ.
When her daughter (the small girl's mother), brought to the attention of the nursery owner, the teenager child-minder denied her doing.

Instead, she accused her colleague of doing it.

The less than two-year-old girl's head was full of blood stains marked by repeatedly hit with a comb.
When it was said that a police report will be made, the first girl, the nursery owner's niece, ran away.
She did not report for work until today.

A police report was still made, not to apprehend the teenager, but just to make sure that no such incident will ever be repeated again.
The girl and her sibling are still there, at the same nursery.
No other nearer place to place them while the mother is at work.

******      ******      ******

I attended a 'hair-shaving ceremony', to not one, but three babies, all cousins.  
"Cukur rambut" at the same time yesterday.

After the ceremony ended, I stayed longer, waiting for My Husband who was still driving from Pasir Gudang to Bukit Tiram.

While waiting, I realised that one of the baby was attended by only the young and handsome father.
The other two babies, both parents attended to their bundle of joy.

One of the relative realised My attention to the lonely and quiet father.
Before I could ask, the relative said, "He's divorced now."

Before I realised, tears were filling My eyes.
I attended his grand wedding just a year or less than two-years ago.
The joyous occasion, the spread of food, sure the very big amount of expenditure spent, to make the solemn marriage occasion, a memorable one.

It is still fresh too, in My mind.
Do not tell me, it has diminished, as good as dead, in the matching couple's memory.

Both have their looks, well-educated and good career.
Both used to be promising people with promising future.
What really goes wrong with them, with the current society?

These small babies are often denied their right of having both parents at their sides.
Their parents can choose their spouses, but these babies cannot choose their parents.
Their parents are not replaceable.
So, there is no replacement for both their mother and father.

These babies are surely not in the position to shoulder whatever their parents disagree.
Neither can they be made to suffer in doings they do not.

Seeing crumbling marriages with their families disintegrated around Me, is really disturbing.
The number of divorces is really alarming.

I remember reading, where Deputy Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Dr Mashitah Ibrahim said, statistics by the Malaysian Department of Islamic Development (Jakim), showed that the divorce rate among married Muslim couples was one every 15 minutes in 2009.

Now, the number of Syariah Court judges is sufficient, but their case load grows by... the 15 minutes.

******      ******      ******

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that
we have taller buildings but shorter tempers,
wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less,
we buy more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families,
more conveniences, but less time.
We have more degrees but less sense,
more knowledge, but less judgment,
more experts, yet more problems,
more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little,
drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up to O tired, read too little,
watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've added years to life not life to years.
We've been all the way to the moon and back,
but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space.
We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less.
We've learned to rush, but not to wait.
We build more computers to hold more information,
to produce more copies than ever,
but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion,
big men and small character,
steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce,
fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips,
disposable diapers,
throwaway morality, one night stands,
overweight bodies,
and pills that do everything from cheer,
to quiet,
to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window
and nothing in the stockroom.
A time when technology can bring this letter to you,
and a time when you can choose either to share this insight,
or to just hit delete...

Remember;
spend some time with your loved ones,
because
they are not going to be around forever.

Remember,
say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe,
because
that little person soon will grow up
and leave your side.

Remember,
to give a warm hug to the one next to you,
because
that is the only treasure you can give with your heart
and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember,
to say, "I love you" to your partner
and your loved ones,
but most of all mean it.
A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt
when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember
to hold hands
and cherish the moment
for someday
that person will not be there again.

Give time to love,
give time to speak!
And give time to share
the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured
by the number of breaths we take,
but
by the moments that take our breath away.


George Carlin.

Source: The Hive Mod Bee - Thursday, November 1, 2007

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